The Faith that won't invite Jesus In

Matthew 8:5-13 (ESV)
When he entered Capernaum, a centurion came forward to him, appealing to him, [6] "Lord, my servant is lying paralyzed at home, suffering terribly." [7] And he said to him, "I will come and heal him." [8] But the centurion replied, "Lord, I am not worthy to have you come under my roof, but only say the word, and my servant will be healed. [9] For I too am a man under authority, with soldiers under me. And I say to one, 'Go,' and he goes, and to another, 'Come,' and he comes, and to my servant, 'Do this,' and he does it." [10] When Jesus heard this, he marveled and said to those who followed him, "Truly, I tell you, with no one in Israel have I found such faith. [11] I tell you, many will come from east and west and recline at table with Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob in the kingdom of heaven, [12] while the sons of the kingdom will be thrown into the outer darkness. In that place there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth." [13] And to the centurion Jesus said, "Go; let it be done for you as you have believed." And the servant was healed at that very moment.

“Truly I tell you with no one in Israel have I found such faith.” What I find amazing about this section of scripture is that Jesus considers it faith that this man considers himself so unworthy of Jesus’s presence that he won’t even invite the man into his house, much less his heart!
We are such an arrogant lot these days. If we truly understood who Jesus was we would tremble at the thought that this man would come to our home and see that mess, even more terrified would we be to invite him into our hearts that are continually pouring out evil thoughts of lust, murder and theft, gossip and sensuality.
I guess the thing is, I disgust myself. Some days I hate myself. It isn’t that I suffer low self esteem, or anything like that. I’m an arrogant ass most of the time. That disgusts me too. But no, I just know who I really am, and I know who I really should be. I know I don’t live up to the law. It isn’t low self esteem, it is just being honest with myself. I know my heart, yet in truth I don’t know it near as well as Jesus does. I do know though that this isn’t a warm fuzzy place to invite a conversation with Jesus. A sewer would be a more apt place to invite Jesus than my heart. And I suspect this is rather true of everyone given what Jesus himself has to say about a person’s heart.
The only way of truly living and truly loving is to recognize this about yourself and others, then love rests on forgiving, and being forgiven. It is the only way.
And that is what is so incredible about Jesus. He knows our hearts. And because he knows our hearts better than we do, he does not expect us to invite him in there. In fact, he has every right to be insulted by the arrogance of an individual doing so. Yet he does not shy from taking up residence there. He marveled at the faith of the centurion who understood who He was, and therefore was humble enough to realize his home was not a worthy place for the Lord. But the Lord Jesus was not unwilling to go to the house, and even asked to do so. Jesus knows your heart, and the truth is that he does live there, not because you want him there, but because he wants to live there. He takes up residence there and in so doing forgives your sins, and constantly forgives, that you might have a clean heart, a good conscience, and know the joy of your salvation.